I've never shared my guacamole recipe before, so feel pretty lucky you're reading it now.

Slice up them avocados and put them in a wide dish. You'll thank me later.

Keep three of the best looking pits and set them to the side. You'll thank me tomorrow.

Use a butter knife to slice through all the avocados. HEY! I did NOT say to mash them! You're just getting them ready for that.

Slice the lemon in quarters. Put the fork between the slices of lemon and squeeze. I'm not kidding here. If you do that, it guides the juice down the tines of the fork into your bowl and not your eye. You're welcome!

Did you pick out the seeds I hope?

Now use that handy dandy fork to mash the avocados. We don't want them super creamy, we want some lumps...not a ton though. If you leave too many, people think you're weak and can't handle the task. This is where that low bowl helps out. You're welcome!

Add the remaining ingredients and stir.

Clean the edges of the bowl if you're expecting company. Arrange the three pits in the center of your bowl. This keeps your Frankenstein color longer.

Grab a tortilla chip and dip to sample your wares. Adjust to your liking.